“Always pander to a panda. It suppresses the animal’s innate pandemonium.” #writing #throwawayline

“If you ‘roll with it’ you’re already wrapped around the thing you’re rolling with.” #writing #throwawayline

“He was between a rock and a hard place—marriage and lust.” #writing #throwawayline

“He’s like the guy who declares he never throws stones, until he does.” #writing #throwawayline

“Tarantula Rex” #writing #throwawayline

“When you walk into a bar, you’re drunk. You’re supposed to go into a bar sober, and walk out of a bar drunk..” #writing #throwawayline

“If you insult everyone, that’s fine. If you miss insulting someone, you’re a bigot.” #writing #throwawayline

“He was as sodded as the last sodded guy.” #writing #throwawayline

“You’re already odd. Now, it’s time to get even.” #writing #throwawayline

“I don’t know what I’m doing. I throw walls at spaghetti. I don’t like walls” #writing #throwawayline .

“Sir, the koalas are massing at the border.” #writing #throwawayline

“Life is quitting time.” #writing #throwawayline

“I’m in the no.” “Yes, you are.” #writing #throwawayline

“Few people, nowadays, remember the comedy team of the Marx brothers: Vladimir, Karl, Mao, and Tito.” #writing #throwawayline

“He cried, as an infant cries. Which was appropriate since he was an appropriated infant.” #writing #throwawayline

“Magicians are charlatans, because they have no source of power. That’s why sorcerer’s are to be taken seriously.” #writing #throwawayline

“The Reliquary of Endless Caffeine” #writing #throwawayline

“Put your nose to the litterbox.” #writing #throwawayline

“He rolled his Rs the way they rolled him as a drunk.” #writing #throwawayline

“You don’t have a wine cellar? Where do you bury the bodies?” #writong #throwawayline

“Life isn’t a joke. It’s just an endless roll of a D20.” #writing #throwawayline

“Thieves can’t die.” #writing #throwawayline

“She cracked her knuckles, staring at him. The pig didn’t survive.” #writing #throwawayline

“He was strange. But he wasn’t a doctor. He just enjoyed dead people more than he should.” #writing #throwawayline

“Rome was built in a day—just not an Earth day.” #writing #throwawayline